Drug testing

Grief Support: The Dos

Helpers often ask questions such as: "What should I do? What should I say? Am I doing the right thing? Did I do the wrong thing?" Here are some suggestions for how to best help those in grief.

1) Do give grievers the permission to grieve. You do this by your presence, understanding and acceptance of where they are.

2) Do expect volatile reactions from the bereaved. Those in grief are on an emotional roller coaster.

3) Do be "present" to the bereaved. Give the griever your full attention as they share their loss with you. It is so very meaningful to them and therapeutic as well.

4) Do view the loss from the griever's perspective. Their loss is unique and their pain is their own. You cannot know their loss without viewing it from their perspective.

5) Do maintain an appropriate emotional distance from the griever. Do not make their loss your loss.

6) Do encourage verbalization of feelings and memories of the deceased. Talking about the one who died is therapeutic for those suffering grief. It helps them process their loss and begin to formulate perspective.

7) Do help the bereaved recognize and accept the loss.

8) Do listen non-judgmentally and with acceptance.

9) Do allow the grieved to cry, talk, and review without interruption.

10) Do help the griever with normative data about the grief process. Assure the grieved that they are not "crazy" and that what they are experiencing is all a part of the grief process.

11) Do help the griever with practical responsibilities (grocery shopping, take the children for a couple of hours, drive to the bank, make phone calls, etc.).

12) Do help the griever understand the need to develop a new relationship with the deceased.

13) Do be informed about grief and providing gentle compassionate care.

14) Do be helpful and keep in touch.

15) Do encourage healing.

16) Do encourage counseling if behaviors appear pathological or extreme.

17) Do be aware that weekends, holidays and evenings may be more difficult for the bereaved.

18) Do help the bereaved avoid unrealistic expectations as to how they "should" feel and when they will be better. It is helpful when appropriate to say, "I don't know how you are able to do as well as you are."

19) Do ask griever to accompany you on some outing or engage in some activities with you (at appropriate time of course).

20) Do encourage grievers to participate in support groups.

Rev. Saundra L. Washington, D.D., is an ordained clergywoman, social worker, and Founder of AMEN Ministries. http://www.clergyservices4u.org She is also the author of two coffee table books: Room Beneath the Snow: Poems that Preach and Negative Disturbances: Homilies that Teach. Her new book, Out of Deep Waters: A Grief Healing Workbook, will be available soon.

limousine chicago service
In The News:

Suicide in the Church Part 1

Recently, several suicides have occurred right here in my own... Read More

You Have to Show Up: On Small Miracles (Okay, maybe not so small)

I hadn't intended to go to my cousin's funeral.That sounds... Read More

Grief

If you have ever lost someone dear to you it... Read More

When Change Comes (Dealing With Grief and Loss)

Needless to say, the time after loss is volatile and... Read More

Miracles?

If we were to organize a list of the thorniest... Read More

Grief

I didn't know a heart could die before it stopped... Read More

Sympathy Messages

The loss of a loved one. It is often difficult... Read More

The Lesson of a Mothers Death

Dedicated to my mother, FlorenceNovember 11, 1920 ? May 25,... Read More

Grief & Loss - Healing Your Broken Heart

What is it about Grief & Loss that upsets us... Read More

Present Moment Awareness: Lessons From My Dog

I've always waited for the perfect moment to be happy:... Read More

Men and Grief

Men grieve differently from women. Our cultural roles make it... Read More

Understanding Grief and Loss in Times of War and Disaster

There are many different kinds of losses we can experience... Read More

When Sorrow Is Too Great to Be Borne Alone, Support Groups Reach Out

Not long after Arlyn died, my husband and I decided... Read More

Dealing With Grief and Loss - How to Mend a Broken Heart

What is it about Grief & Loss that upsets us... Read More

Then and Now

Over one hundred years ago, during the Victorian era, death... Read More

What is an Appropriate Sympathy Gift?

When a friend or loved one is grieving, it is... Read More

Are We All Losers? Understanding Grief

The well-known pioneer researcher Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross identified five states... Read More

A Critical Assessment of Euthanasia

The question of whether, say, a man should have the... Read More

Sympathy Flowers

Sending a floral tribute is a very appropriate way of... Read More

Grief Support: The Dos

Helpers often ask questions such as: "What should I do?... Read More

Dads, Life, and Death

When he looked at me, it was clear my father... Read More

When The Spirit Leaves The Body

Do you spend most of your time inside or outside... Read More

Graceful Grief: Angelic Help is on the Way!

I believe that major change and loss in our lives... Read More

Whats It All About?

For most people life is a fairly ordinary existence -... Read More

Loss Involves Change - The Transformative Power of Loss and Change

There are many experiences in life, which remind us that... Read More

led street lights cost best street lights Pete's produce ..